Aurora Brewing Challenge

This week was the Aurora Brewing Challenge - the annual BJCP sanctioned beer competition hosted by the Edmonton Homebrewer's Guild, and the only MCAP qualifier in Canada. (Masters Championship of Amateur Brewing) Nick the Mighty Brewer and I did quite well, taking 8 medals and second place in the Brewer of the Year completion. The winner really threw in a ton of beer, and deserved the win. Best of show was won by a fellow who entered only one beer - but it was a very good one, obviously. Jenn took part in the ladies auxiliary competition, judging themed beers made with rosemary. Ours didn't place in that competition, but as a consolation prize, we took a medal with it in the main competition, ahead of any of the others.

Long story short, that is the end of the competitive brewing season, and I am beered out.

Also, if you live in Alberta and you want a tasty cooler product, drink the coolers from Ambers Brewing. They are incredible. Way way way better than every other cooler on the market.

Latest News

Jenn has now been officially accepted the the U of A after degree in nursing.  I will therefore not be getting a new (or used) sports car for the foreseeable future.  On the other hand, I have been promised one when she graduates.

My exalted position

I never learned not to volunteer for things.

On the weekend, Jenn and I were at a conference in Lake Louise for divorce lawyers, when the Edmonton Homebrewers Guild was holding their monthly meeting and annual executive elections. I, being the good sport that I am, offered to let my name stand for the presidency of the Edmonton Homebrewers Guild. Needless to say, despite my absence, and perhaps because of it, I was elected (or possibly acclaimed, which I expect is more likely).

Now I just have to figure out how to go about ruling with an iron fist.

Cashmere-ical Redux

Today, having finished work at a reasonable time, I wandered over to my Consignment store and popped my head in the door. This store had been the scene of my great disappointment, the notion that $477.00 was better spent on car repairs than a really fabulous suit.

Well, two months later, and with the sticker price knocked down another $100.00, the suit was still on the rack and I am all of a sudden flush with suit money (and my old charcoal suit getting shiny around the shoulders). Long story short, I am the proud owner of a gorgeous, conservative, Italian hand made designer cashmere suit, for about what I would pay for a cheap suit at a clearance outlet.

Sometimes good things happen to me. Other times, I just get new work clothes and that makes me happy too.

Beerstuff

since the last time I mentioned beer, Nick the Mighty Brewer and I have made the following styles:

1C American Premium Lager
2A German Pilsner
21 Rosemary Herbed Scottish 80/
1E Dortmunder Export
17 A Berlinner Weiss

Mmmmm, beer.

The proof

You would not believe how hard they tried to get me to keep the account open. I had to tell the guy about 10 times to shut the bugger down.I thought they wanted people not to havecredit. Aren't people's limits being arbitrarily lowered around the country?

Our little victory

It was long overdue. As of today, Jenn and I have no credit card debt. With Jenn not working full time (very part time, in fact) and the troubles last year, and the expenses of Jenn's classes, we couldn't seem to get ahead, but now, in one fell swoop, we have gotten a rancid little monkey off our backs and taken the scissors to the bastards, for the most part. What joy. Just in time to start saving towards Jenn's tuition for fall.

Jenn and Owen finally get something they want

Notwithstanding the persistent annoyance of water heaters and such, we have finally sprung for a car under warranty.  Last year's (base) model, discounted, lengthy financing, but here we have something that will carry us a while before needing costly repairs, and if it does, someone else will be covering it, thank you very much.  We have swapped the uncertainty of an unreliable car for the certainty of our payment, which is a swap I am willing to make with Jenn going back to school.

She doesn't have a name yet, but she is Bright electric blue, and we love her very much.  If you see someone in their front drive applying name-brand car finishes, it might be us.

This is starting to get a little old.

Just a little bit of winter left for us to deal with here in the gret white north.


HEAVY SNOW AND BLOWING SNOW EXPECTED FOR TONIGHT AND SUNDAY. THIS IS A WARNING THAT DANGEROUS WINTER WEATHER CONDITIONS ARE IMMINENT OR OCCURRING IN THESE REGIONS. MONITOR WEATHER CONDITIONS...LISTEN FOR UPDATED STATEMENTS.
A STRONG LOW PRESSURE SYSTEM CURRENTLY DEVELOPING OVER SOUTHERN ALBERTA AND MONTANA IS FORECAST TO MOVE NORTH-NORTHEAST THROUGH SOUTHEASTERN ALBERTA TONIGHT AND INTO CENTRAL SASKATCHEWAN BY SUNDAY. SNOW WILL START OVER SOUTHERN ALBERTA THIS EVENING AND SPREAD INTO THE CENTRAL AND NORTHERN ALBERTA LATE OVERNIGHT AND EARLY SUNDAY MORNING. ON SUNDAY WIDESPREAD HEAVY SNOW CAN BE EXPECTED OVER MANY LOCALITIES WITH AMOUNTS IN THE RANGE BETWEEN 10 TO 20 CENTIMETRES BY SUNDAY EVENING. IN ADDITION STRONG WINDS ASSOCIATED WITH THIS SYSTEM CAN PRODUCE POOR VISIBILITY IN OPEN AREAS DUE TO BLOWING SNOW.

Same day service, classic small-town gouging.

The answer to "How fast can Owen and Jenn get a new hot water tank?" is apparently four hours from first making that call. The answer to the question "What will it cost"? is exactly as much as it would cost to pay a city plumber to come and do it, except the city plumber would be charging almost half the install fee as mileage to and from Spruce Grove, and the locals just jack up their prices and pocket the difference.

So, a thousand bucks later, I get to sit back and bask in the joy of my brand-new water heater, and Wonder just what will be the next thing to go horribly horribly wrong with the house.

How do you spell, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"?

Say, you know that feeling you get when you walk down to the basement to put away the luggage that has been sitting in the garage since summer and you notice that there is an inch of water on the floor and a huge jet of water is shooting out of the TOP of your water heater? You know, its the same feeling you get when you really really really want to drink Gin until you fall asleep. Instead, you shout curses until your very ill wife comes downstairs and finds the shutoff valve. At least I was clever enough to also shut off the gas valve. Oh, and it was a year past its warranty.

Now we get to find out how long it takes to get a new water heater in the boonies. What fun. Oh boy I tell you what I SO want to buy a new water heater instead of a new cashmere suit or half a trip for two to Mexico or Jenn's books for the fall.

Driving into Spring

After the Edmonton Airport posted record low temperatures a couple of days this past week, including a -52 degree windchill, Jenn and I took a couple of days off and drove down to Calgary...

When we left, the temperature was -15, and when we arrived it was +8. Getting out of the car was like stepping into a new season - a season where your skin doesn't fall off within minutes of exposure to the outdoors. Birds were singing, water was running off of the roof, and there were patches of ground visible that had not been physically scraped clean of snow and ice.

The forecast calls for more of the same, above zero temperatures. I shall celebrate with brewing and a barbecue.

The little flashing red lightning bolt on my computer screen sez:

A COLD FRONT PASSED THROUGH THE EDMONTON REGION LATE YESTERDAY EVENING BRINGING SNOW AND STRONG NORTHWESTERLY WINDS. THE SNOW AND WIND HAVE COMBINED TO GIVE REDUCED VISIBILITIES IN BLOWING SNOW. SNOWFALL AMOUNTS NEAR 10 CM ARE LIKELY BEFORE THE SNOW GRADUALLY TAPERS OFF THIS MORNING. IN COLD LAKE IMPROVEMENT IS NOT EXPECTED UNTIL THIS AFTERNOON WITH HEAVIEST SNOWFALL AMOUNTS OCCURRING OVER SOUTHEASTERN SECTIONS. THIS WINTER STORM CAN PRODUCE POOR TRAVELLING CONDITIONS. PERSONS IN OR NEAR THESE AREAS SHOULD BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR ADVERSE WEATHER CONDITIONS AND LISTEN FOR UPDATED WARNINGS.


Mmmmmmm.... Winter Storm Warning in effect until well after my commute is over.

I am starting to not like winter. It should stop now.

In like a water buffalo, out like a snuffleuphaghus

The temperature outside, with wind chill, for those of you who do not live in Edmonton, is -40. At that particular temperature, it doesn't matter if it is Celsius or Fahrenheit. The old saw, in like a lion, out like a lamb, isn't really applicable. This is too horrible. For those of you who have spent the week in Cuba, and you know who you are, you have missed plenty of bad weather.

I am still without a phone, at least until Saturday, so don't be offended if I haven't called or returned your call.

Winter... slowly..... killing me...... Must............ make it.............. to Spring.............. gasp!

Same old, same old

So in the past two weeks, we have replaced the temperature sensor, coolant, thermostat and timing belt in the Hyundai, to the tune of a grand, and now my phone had up and died, thirteen months after buying it and three weeks after the warranty ran out. I am not impressed. Needless to say, any thoughts we might have had about disposable income this month are up in flames. Sigh.

La Boheme Edmonton

Restaurant review for La Boheme

La Boheme is located on 112 Avenue and 64th street in Edmonton in a Bed & Breakfast that has been converted from a block of Pre-WWI luxury apartments. The theme is french, the focus, according to the website, is southern french and Rhone. Notwithstanding this assertion, and apart from a Moroccan Style couscous on the menu, the theme seems to be squarely in the traditional cuisine bourgeois that one would like to expect in a French restaurant.

We arrived at 7:15 for our 7:30 reservation, and were directed immediately to our table, which was set up with two low lounge chairs, leaving the patron leaned back and low at the table. It felt like you were at the kiddie table. On the walls were cheap "french" art prints from Home Outfitters of the type one would buy if one wanted to do a "Paris" themed room in a showhome. The bar was behind us, and had a collection of vintage 'stubbies' along the top. 'Trying very hard to be charming' would be my description of the decor, and throughout the evening, I was back and forth between my impression that this place was either trying too hard or not trying hard enough.

If a place wants to be a cheerful bistro where people can get good french food in a fun atmosphere, that is what it should be. If a restaurant is a fine-dining restaurant, that is what it should be. It should not have the worst aspects of each.

Lets start with the prices - we went because they started a marketing scheme through our local Costco whereby they would sell $100.00 gift cards for $70.00, thereby bringing in the crowd they would not normally get. In reality, they have simply raised the price of the Prix Fixe menu from 70 to 100 dollars to compensate. It still says $70.00 on the website, and that was not the first time we ran into price discrepancies that night.

Soon upon being seated we opted out of the prix fixe in favour of the a-la-carte (a much cheaper option) I ordered escargots in a puff pastry shell with garlic cream emulsion and Jenn, being adventurous, had the soupe a l'onion gratinee, or french onion soup. For a main, I ordered rack of lamb demi-glace medium rare, and jenn ordered the supreme of chicken with a fig and port demi-glace and camborzola cheese. The house wine selection was good, I had a glass of Chapoutier Rhone and Jenn had the house rose.

Then we started to wait.

Bread arrived - 4 small pieces of warmed over baguette, along with little plastic tubs of dairymaid butter. Here is where I first started to get the impression that something was wrong. In a restaurant where the set menu is $100.00 plus wine, you don't serve plastic tubs of butter that wouldn't be out of place at a cheap roadside diner. Hell, even Denny's provides a tub of whipped butter if you get the pancakes. How hard is it to do a few curls of butter for your guests? As the bread was going on the table, the basket overturned, and flew on the floor. Another was provided, but this was the first sign that our servers were not the 'a' team.

CRASH! A stack of plates comes crashing down in the kitchen.

I look at Jenn as two old guys in berets speaking to each other in broad Albertan twangs sit down for coffee at the next table, talking about used cars and casinos. Loudly.

Eventually the appetizers arrive. Mine is placed too far to the right and on top of my knife. If it had been the soup of the day, it would have been on my lap. We dig in. Both are salty.... very salty, but what do you expect from french onion soup? Mine was at least tasty. Can't really screw up garlic and cream. The puff pastry shell was kind of tough. I've done better pastry myself, and I am quite the neophyte. I wouldn't be surprised to find out that the shells are pre-made and frozen until needed. The plate holding each appy was on a larger charger plate with a paper napkin between. Not a fancy one either, the kind you buy by the thousand at Costco.

The old guys in berets get up, wander over to an empty table, pull the chairs around, and, I kid you not, pulled out a fiddle and accordion and began playing jazz standards. It seemed like a kind of desperate attempt to seem french. If I had come across a restaurant doing this in France, I would have probably given it a wide berth, as it was obviously directed at yokel tourists.

The empty cocktail glass that a waitress had left on the empty table in the middle of the room was still there some time later.

Then the espresso machine began to flood the area behind the bar. Mop, mop, mop.....CRASH! Another something hits the floor in the kitchen.

Jenn was parched after the salt in her soup, and her water was long since empty.... I gave her mine. It was a long time before they were filled again.

Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Went the ancient Pepsi cooler behind the bar, until the maitre-d went over and slapped it hard in the logo across the top - behind which the compressor was having a seizure.

Time passed. Patience waned. At 8:45, well over an hour after we had ordered, our mains arrived, coated in the saltiest demi-glace I have ever tasted. By that time, Jenn's rose was warm. Jenn couldn't finish her chicken. I made an effort on my rack of lamb, which was, at least, cooked medium-rare, and even dug into the blandest herbed mashed potatoes I have ever had. Nothing was outstanding. Nothing was worth the price on the menu. We complained about the saltiness of the demi-glace and looked at the dessert menu. We decided - based on the other food - to give dessert a miss. We just wanted to leave. The bill arrived, and Jenn's chicken was $4.00 more than the price on the menu, notwithstanding it was not a bargain t that price either, we decided not to complain but to pay up and leave.

$125.00 including tax and tip for a meal with no dessert and two glasses of house wine.

I give La Boheme a failing grade.

Those of you who know me know that while I may be a bit of a connoisseur, I am not a snob. I will dig into a good corn-dog or greasy diner breakfast with equal enthusiasm as I hold for hommard a l'americainne grattinee or a hundred bucks worth of prime sushi. The problem isn't that I am snobby, or that I am looking to find fault. I went to La Boheme half desperate to have a good experience. What I got was food with low scores for execution and a staff who would have gotten themselves fired from any Earls they might have been lucky enough to be hired at. The whole thing reeked of a non-pro status, and that isn't worth the price of admission.

So here's what's happening on the Car/Cashmere front

The car won. Ultimately, no matter how fabulous, I can't drive a suit from Spruce Grove to Edmonton. Now I am planning to catch up some deferred maintenance on the Sonata, since I've already dropped two grand into it this year, I may as well drop the extra grand and let it carry me another 30,000 klicks. The Civic might be leaving us if we can arrange it. Depending on our money situation, we may end up financing a new vehicle, or, more likely, buying a nearly new used car when a hefty bonus or our accident settlement or tax refund or other unexpected windfall comes in. Really, all we need is something that is not so worn out as the Civic's 190,000 km. It doesn't have to be super fancy, it would be nice if it had AC.

In other news, I will be putting my first lager (German Pilsner) in bottles this weekend. We shall see how it turns out. My second lager will be bottled within the next month or two, an American Premium Lager brewed on Saturday.

Irony

Price of a cashmere blend Canali suit currently on hold for me at my consignment store: $477.00

Cost of a new thermostat and heat sensor to prevent my car from stalling in traffic at unfortunate times: $477.00.

Owen's absolute Maximum disposable income this month: $477.00.

A perfectly reasonable question

...has been raised, that being, "What does BJCP stand for?" The answer: Beer Judge Certification Program.

The BJCP is an organization dedicated to increasing knowledge about and appreciation of good beer and developing the skills of beer tasting and beer judging. I am a member and a Certified Level Judge.

The BJCP has, through the efforts of certain individuals, developed a set of guidelines for the tasting and judging of 80 of the most common beer styles, or rather of 79 styles and one catch-all category. It is my goal to brew every style on those guidelines and by doing so increase my knowledge and understanding of beer and brewing, try beers that are not available commercially in Canada, and generally have a good time and feel accomplished. I really enjoy the process of making beer because my work does not produce anything more tangible than fat piles of paper and hurt feelings, and this lets me feel connected to a product. Slow beer, as it were. Also, this process is a lot simpler than the Julie/Julia Project, which was a bit of the inspiration for it. I cheat a bit by using recipes drawn from various sources including Brew Your Own Magazine and the excellent book, "Brewing Classic Styles" if not verbatim than certainly as inspiration.

A long week

Toady is the latest in a series of days where I am the only lawyer in the office. Needless to say, I am getting a lot of work done because I have four assistants at my disposal. The down side is that I am dealing with everyone else's strangeness as well as my own, which is putting a premium on my time. At the same time, Jenn seems to have injured her elbow by hitting it on a doorknob at school, and has the sort of lung-filling cough that I associate with septuagenarian two-pack a day smokers. Throw into that mix the fact that on my way to court this morning - to sort out a problem that Legal Aid was having in telling clients that we are acting for them when we are not, I slipped on 3 inch thick ice on the sidewalk and landed heavily on my wrist and hip, bruising both of them as well as my ego. Now I am taking a break from work here at the office as I wait the last ten minutes for my 6:00 PM appointment.

All of this is conspiring to wear me out a little. I would like nothing better than to go to bed early on Friday and sleep until sometime on Sunday afternoon, but if I did that, no beer would get made this weekend, and that would be a shame. Last weekend Nick and I started in on Style 10C, American Brown Ale. With that one and a German Pilsner to bottle, and possibly another to start this weekend, I have a busy Saturday ahead of me if Nick is free.

Just to recap on the beer, for those who vaguely care, I started this quest to brew every style in the BJCP guidelines about two years ago, and began to do it seriously about a year ago. Of the 80 styles in the guidelines, I have brewed 14, and of those, I just sent 10 to competition in Calgary. We will have to see how we do.

Not sure what the next style we will be taking on will be, but I suspect that we may have to try out a Trappist - possibly a dubbel. If we had any Northern Brewer Hops, we would be setting into California Common Beer, but the shortage has hit us hard in that respect. Those fellows at Anchor seem to have cornered the market, and I may need to use my Californial Lager yeast to fire us up a Cream Ale and maybe Blonde as well.

All of the beer promises to take less time now that I have sprung for the $4.00 adapter that will allow me to attach my drill to my malt mill and change from 60 RPM to 360 RPM. Yeah. That's what we need here... More Power.

Cashmiracle on 120th Street

I have posted previously about my not-so-secret, not-so-shameful lust for the ultimate items of mixed conformity/non-conformity, finely tailored woolen goods. I have posted previously the whys and hows of my habit. Today, I must give a nod to the near-telepathic, deal-with-the-devil customer skills of the propriotrix of my favourite consignment shop.

The sign in the window said "Blowout Sale". I was naturally concerned that this equated to "Going out of Business Sale", and went inside on my way back from court. Not at all, simply getting rid of the winter gear in favour of some spring items and cruise-wear.

I will not buy a suit. I will not buy a suit. I will not buy a suit. I will not buy a suit.

I need a shirt.

A nice semi-casual shirt;

something bright;

maybe with french cuffs.

Say, it can't hurt to look at the 42 regular section, can it? Just to see? Just to look? I'm not buying you understand... Oh...... Oh My............. Canali Charcoal chalk-stripe...... Cashmere? Oh my word........ 30% off? Let me see, at $1800.00 regular off the rack new, I'm already getting about 60% off this apparently new suit..... and another 30% would make it.........

NO! No, I shan't buy a suit.

I will not buy a suit. I will not buy a suit. I will not buy a suit. Ooh! Paisley!

I need a paisley shirt. And that pink Hugo Boss with the french Cuffs for $12.00. That will do nicely. I'll just go try this on.

What? Yes? Yes they both seem to fit, I don't suppose I could trouble you for some cufflinks just to see? What? Yes, actually...... I did see that Canali Chalk Stripe...... Yes, I know it's cashmere......................

......

......

Well, I suppose it couldn't hurt to just try it on........

Oh.....

Oh my......

Yes, I see that it doesn't even need to be tailored. The cuffs hang just so, the pants break just right...........

Let me see...... the mortgage payment goes through the first..........

Could you hold this for me until, say, Valentine's Day?

Of course she could........

Beer Stuff toady

Today, with a visit from Nick the Mighty Brewer, we racked the lager we made last wek, a german pilsner, and started an American Amber ale (10B).

That's about it.

F-4

F-4 pounds.  That was the verdict when I woke up this morning, notwithstanding the fact that I blew my diet badly on Friday with a trip to Shan-E-Punjab (I think that's what it's called) located in a converted Arby's in Mill Woods.  Mmmmm, Butter Chicken.

Also this weekend Nick the mighty brewer came by and we cooked up a batch of German Pilsner, our first stab at a lager, since Saturday was the first day in about two months where we could stand to be on the deck for any amount of time.  It seemed to go well.

This weekend was not long enough.  I think I slept through most of it.  I am not impressed to be going back to work on Monday.

Day 1: F - 0

Well, after an indulgent holiday season, which followed close on the heels of a generally indulgent year, food wise, I stepped up on the scale today and decided that I have let myself go completely to seed.  I have let myself get fat.  My clothes still fit, after a fashion, but I am a long way from my best weight.  Here I am, fat.  How much do I weigh?  Unimportant.  I am assigning my weight the variable "F" (as in 'Fat').  

My goal?  F-25 pounds by July 30, 2009.

How to do it?

I am going back to the formula that worked for me so well the last time - STOP EATING SO MUCH CRAP!  I might even try the other option open which is, of course - GET OFF YOUR DUFF!

Wish me luck people, and remember that your constant ridicule when I publicly fail (as I will be tracking this) is vital to my progress.

Merry Christmas

Well, two turkey dinners down, and one to go, now that we were invited (at 8:45 on Christmas Day) to a boxing day feast with Jenn's Dad's Brother's side of the family.  A good time is promised to be had by all, but if I see another bite of turkey, I think I will go mental.  If you'll excuse me, I got two bottles of scotch for Christmas, and I need to get to work on that.  They aren't just going to drink themselves.  

Merry Christmas, Everyone!

Frozen Projectile Vomit

You know that feeling you get when you walk out to your car on a brisk -32 degree morning and you look in the back seat of your car and it appears that someone has had massive projectile vomiting and the vomit is now frozen to your seats, carpet, door panels and ceiling?  

I do.

Turns out I left a can of cola under the back seat during our last road trip to Calgary and it went off in the middle of the night, spraying frozen cola into the upholstery.  I did not have a good morning that morning.  I had to use my ice scraper to get the coke off the seats and roof.  I was not a happy camper.  Once it is above freezing for a few days, I will have to shampoo the whole back of the car.  

Ugh.

What should we be able to do? A request for input:

Yesterday, our articling student at work was late.  I was later, but that is not the issue.  The reason she was late was that her car would not start and needed to be boosted because of the cold.  Instead, her Mother drover her to work.  They had a working car and jumper cables, but did not boost the car themselves.  Why not?  "My dad wasn't there."

Really?

Is that were we are as a society that a young lady of reasonable intelligence can't jump start a car without her father doing it for her?

It got me to thinking, and chatting with a handful of people, what should a person be able to do by the time they reach adulthood?  We came up with a list.  I hope that my readers will provide any additional suggestions.

1. Jump start a car.  This is important because you can use it to help people, help yourself, avoid a 5 hour wait for the auto club, and if a good Samaritan is doing it wrong to your vehicle, they might set your engine on fire before they get your car started.

2. Change a tire.  See 1.

3. Drive a manual transmission.

4. Ride a bicycle.

5. Swim 100 meters without stopping.  This could save your life.

6. Cook a meal for 8 from scratch.  One that is reasonably impressive.  Everyone needs a party piece, and the skills you learn doing this will probably carry over to any number of other preparations.

7. Start a campfire.  Not in heavy winds without matches or tools, just under normal circumstances and without making yourself look like an ass.  I have taught bright 11 year olds to do this, you should be able to as well.

8. Chop wood without injuring yourself.  Again, 11 year olds.

9. Eat a formal dinner without embarrassing yourself.  Come on now people, is this really difficult?

10. Tie a necktie.  If you are a female, you must be able to do it in reverse for your partner who lacks this skill.  It is never acceptable to tie a tie once and leave it that way on the hanger.  It will damage the tie, shortening its life and creasing it in terrible ways, and you will look silly because of it.

11. Iron a shirt without damaging it.

12. Polish your shoes with a paste polish, not the kind that squeezes out of a bottle onto a sponge.  There is a reason they still make the old-fashioned stuff, it works a hundred times better.

13. The next two made the list because of some of the younger people I have met who have problems with them.  Tie your shoes.  Velcro and slip-on skate shoes have not made shoelaces obsolete.  It is also not acceptable to leave the shoes tied and treat them as slip-ons because, first it makes you look silly, and second it will result in damage to your shoes, feet and posture.

14. Tell analog time without thinking about it.  If you have to use the words "big hand" and "little hand" in your head, you need to work on this skill.

15. Tell 'Military' or 24 hour time without thinking about it.  When you are at the airport looking at the flight arrivals screen, you don't want to ask stupid questions.

16. Play an instrument and read sheet music.  This may be the most difficult set of skills on the list, but if you master them you have achieved something of value.

17. Perform general first aid.  You could save a life.  It may be yours.

18. Tell three jokes suitable for mixed company.  They should be funny, and you should be able to tell them with some panache.

19. Hammer in a nail without injuring yourself or bending it in half.

20. Make change without electronic assistance.  I am constantly shocked at how many people in the retail trade can't do this - a skill that takes one minute to learn.

21. Tip appropriately without asking silly questions or using a calculator.

22. Sew on a button and hem a pair or pants.  I admit that I cannot do the latter.  It irks me that I have to pay someone to do it for me.

My dad, being somewhat more frontiers-y than I am, made three additional suggestions, which I include in decreasing order of my own perception of their relevance.

23. Load and fire a firearm safely.  I actually agree with this for a number of reasons and was waffling about whether to include it myself.  First, when the zombie apocalypse comes, everyone will need to know how to do this, it just makes sense.  Second, even in the absence of zombies, I can conceive of social circumstances where a person might be called upon to fire a firearm.  I don;t want to be the fellow who doesn't join the lads  for a day's trap shooting because I am embarrassed by my lack of knowledge.  Ultimately, firearms are still somewhat prevalent in north American society, less so in Canada, but still there, and it would benefit a person to have a working knowledge of something so potentially dangerous that they may interact with.  That having been said, the other reason is that shooting guns is totally fun.  I don't believe in private citizens using firearms for "protection", I don't hunt, all I do is enjoy the act of shooting.  

24. Operate a chainsaw.  Arguably it is more likely that a person will be called upon to operate a chainsaw than a firearm, but I don't foresee the likelihood of a social interaction involving chainsaws.  That having been said, if the power is out and you need firewood, this is a handy skill to have.

25. Castrate cattle.  What can I say?  My dad put in some farm time as a child.  I cannot reasonably foresee any person being called upon unexpectedly to castrate cattle, nor can I foresee someone placed in that situation being left to the task without instruction.

There you have it.  I definitely need a new #25.  Help if you will.

Well, it had to end sooner or later.

Up until now, the weather has been enough to make Ralph Klein believe in global warming.  That will change on the weekend when it is set to drop to -30 for the first time this year.  

That more or less puts the kibosh on any brewing I was planning to do on the weekend.  What may have to get done is the laundry that has been piling up and the ironing that I have been avoiding for so long.  All that aside, I can honestly say that the Christmas season is starting to get a little dull ever since I finished my shopping.  We aren't even hosting a dinner this year, so there is really nothing to panic about.

This means that I will need to get something going.  I need to plan a party.  Yes.  Party.  Jenn will love that.

Grey Cup Weekend

It was a long weekend.  Not very relaxing.  On the up side, on Sunday, Nick and I fired up a batch of Beer - 8 C Extra Special Bitter - which means that we have finished one entire category of beer from the list - English pale ale.  It smells really good, too.

I have also managed to lay my hands on some English "special Roast" and "Brown Malt" which will expand some of the types of beer I can make right now.  That having been said, I am thinking of trying to brew some lager this winter as one corner of my basement is reliably about 50 degrees Fahrenheit, so that opens up a large portion of previously accessed beers.

Also fun is the fact that I seem to be settling files at a tremendous rate, so that I might have room to take on new clients after Christmas.  

Maybe I can use this parchment to keep cookies from sticking...

So here I am, with yet another university degree on my wall.  BA, LLB, LLM.  How does this affect my life?  New business cards.  Any other way?  Not really.  I'm published in the library of Parliament, does that count?

To celebrate, gonna make beer and watch the Grey Cup.  Not quite sure what kind of beer yet.  Maybe ESB, maybe porter.

Christmas shopping and beer

Yesterday, Jenn and I celebrated our Sunday by going to Costco and doing our Christmas shopping.  There are few things I like more than going to Costco at Christmas and finding some of the best and most acclaimed books of the year (and I am thinking particularly of cookbooks) for about half of what I would pay anywhere else.  I also love it when their cheese selection goes from 20 to 60 overnight.  That makes me happy.

When we got home, Jenn helped me to bottle two batches of beer, an Imperial (or double) India Pale Ale, clocking in at 7.3% ABV and well over 100 IBU, which had a lovely grapefruit aroma and is called Amarillo Sunset, and a Belgian Golden Strong of about 9% which I haven't named yet.  Needless to say, large bottles of these two should be treated with caution.

Obligatory Obama Victory Post

I finally feel as though our long global nightmare - the failed experiment called neoconservatism - might starting the slow but inevitable road to the end.  The death-throes might linger, but the next time the same ideas come around, hopefully it will be under some new moniker.  I will be satisfied with a couple of terms of centre-left classical liberalism with some social conscience thrown in for good measure.  

Obama invoked Lincoln, when he spoke about the "Better angels" of America's nature.  It has been a long time since most of the world has seen that from the American administration.  I hope that the new administration can remind the rest of the world what we love about America - not the power or wealth or culture (trust me, it ain't any of those things) - but the real ideology of America that people are basically good, that if left alone most people will do the right thing, and that if you aren't hurting anyone, more power to you.  The Americans I have ever dealt with have been kind, generous, more or less charming, and most have a fascinating optimism about the world and its perfectibility.  I love that.  

I have heard America compared to a big, friendly, badly trained dog.  You might get slobbered on, things might get knocked over or your yard dug up, but mostly intentions are good if you don't annoy it too much.  For too many years, the dog has gone from a friendly pup to a fear-biting and suspicious pound dog.

Lets keep our fingers crossed for the good dog to come back. 

Two more beers and other news

On Thanksgiving Nick and I brewed a Belgian Golden Strong, a style you may have seen in the store as "Fin Du Monde" or "Delerium Tremens" or "Duvel"  And clocks in at 8% + alcohol.  The other one we made was an Imperial India Pale Ale, a style developed in the US which has an awful lot of hops in it.  It was our way of celebrating the hop harvest and having five pounds in the freezer at once, a pound of which all went into one batch of beer.  Fabulous.  It smells great.

The other news is that the principal of the school where Jenn had so many problems last year is no longer the principal of that or any school, a change that occurred in the middle of October, no less, which seems to me to be an indication that there were some serious problems with her, probably from many sides.  Jenn just figures that her victory is complete.

Scoring one for the good guys:

Ok... remember back a few years, and the latest greatest thing to come from LucasArts was "X-Wing" which put you in the seat of the fighter spacecraft of the Rebel Alliance?  That was fun and all, but a couple of years later, a much more fun game came out... similar in most ways, similar but improved controls and graphics... but instead, for the first time in franchise history, you were on the side of the Evil Empire.  It felt good.  Oh, the evil.  Bringing order to chaos, imposing your will on radical elements and pacifying cultures through force, just like the Republican Party.

Well, lets just say it can be fun to be the bad guy.  

Which is why I feel odd having just plonked down hard earned cash for that most counter-cultural of desktop computers.  Yes, folks, I am now a Mac User.  For the above-noted evil-empire-type reasons, I have been a PC user for many years, but now that I am married, I no longer get my way, and I am instead forced to embrace the attitudes and OS preferences of my beloved.  And here it is.  I have bought into the Rebel Alliance of computers.

How is it?

Not bad.

Although the selection of game titles is thin.

Success

Yesterday I picked up my new (to me) suit and sport coat from the tiny Vietnamese tailor with foot thick glasses.  The suit isn't anything special, Arnold Brandt, a made in Canada number, not outsourced, grey, with pick-stitching on the lapels, which the tailor was good enough to do the cuffs on... a suit that at Harry Rosen would have listed about $800 or up.

He wouldn't stop raving about my sport-coat, though.  "You no a tailor, so you don't know about these things, but I see inside!  That very good.  You buy good like that and you wear 10 Year!"

Oh, who made the sport coat?  Samuelshon.  Rack price, $999.00.  Picked it up for around $130.00.  

I am so going back to that store.

The other thing is that they have a selection of formalwear that they blow out really really cheap.  Good tuxes for $100-$150, which means that it would be cheaper to buy one than to rent, which means that I am on her "look for this for me" list.

I went over all this with the owner just after my purchases and after mentioning that I only wear vintage cufflinks.  She walks me back to the formalwear section, and takes a look in my size and says, "There's nothing here that you would want.  You want a shawl collar with satin facings, right?"  

Okay, first, yes.  Second, am I really that easy, was it the vintage cufflink thing?  Third, is it odd that a man barely in his thirties who is currently sitting around in a t-shirt that says "Drunken Lazy Bastard" in block letters across the back has an opinion about this?

Yeah, I'm going back there, but I promise, only for ties right now.  (ties you can't even buy in Canada, $12.00)

Oh dear... My spending money budget is going to go out the window.

The new black

Bonus time has come and gone, new appliances s have been purchased, and the subject of a soon-to-come post has been expensively embraced by the family. It has come time for Owen to consider the fact that since beginning his law practice five years ago, he has not been able to afford a new suit.

"But Owen", you say, "surely a successful Barrister such as yourself can afford to buy any number of quality work-related garments! And anyway, you took two years off to "find yourself" and "get married" and "get a Masters" and "Goof Off"".

Fair enough. There have been some new shirts ($1.00 each at a charity sale), shoes (Florshiem Half-Brogues in Black, and a re-soling of my Florshiem Oxfords - leaving me with enough dress shoes to last me for years), barrister's waistcoat (Firm paid), an overcoat (Navy, good wool, no cashmere, on sale at the Bay on Boxing Day) some ties (gifts) and gold vintage Tiffany and Heirloom Cloisonne cuff links (also gifts, and ones I cherish).

My suits, however, have seen better days.

The cuffs on the pants, for example, are starting to go. Also, when I bought my suits, I was about 35 pounds heavier, and it shows in the cut. Even with the pants taken in once, they don't fit well, and I look like I am wearing my big brother's clothes. Even my best dress shits, and my only french cuffs, are wearing out.

I could, you know, go out and buy a suit at any time for cheap. Hell, Moores sells them for $139.00 four times a year. The problem with a cheap suit, and I have owned cheap suits, is that they make you Feel cheap. Further, the website describes the availability of "High Performance" suit fabrics. I am loath to buy a suit at a store that will be willing to sell me a suit in ripstop nylon or red and yellow sharkskin corduroy. The problem I have is one of being spoiled for life. It happened like this:

For years, I remember my dad coming home from work in his uniform. Unlike some of the dads in the neighborhood (I lived near an army base) his uniform was one of a starkly conservative dark business suit with a solid coloured shirt, barrel cuffs, point collars, well-shined shoes (I remember watching him sit with his shoe shine box, polishing his shoes, it stuck with me...) latterly the suits were Samuelsohn, whose off-brand - Cambridge - I wear now. (If I wanted to buy Samuelsohn today, I would be looking at $1800.00, which I can't really afford at this point) The only nod to his up-from-the-ranks background at the company was the only briefcase I have ever known him to carry, a brown plastic Samsonite, engraved as a presentation piece, and of such obvious and crippling sentimental value that carrying it in the latter stages of his career could only have been described as eccentric.

We all turn into our fathers, I suppose. I remember as a young teenager my dad explaining why he would spend that kind of money for a suit, "You only have to buy it once." Little did I know that this was true in more ways than one. Not only are good suits durable in the extreme, but they are as addictive as cigarettes (the other part of my dad's uniform, being a pack of Craven "A" King Sized). Once you wear a good suit, the idea that it is uncomfortable or awkward to wear a suit and tie is forever abolished, and you will generally refuse to wear a suit that does not conform to your newly raised standards.

He still wears Sameulsohn, my dad, creature of habit that he is. A sport coat on sale at Ed Williams in Calgary that feels wonderful, and will last another 20 years. I think back to my dad's unused suits and regret that we no longer wear the same size as one another, as we did for a brief period in 1993.

When I graduated from law school in 2003, I scammed a line of credit from my bank, "I'm starting my first job out of law school in two weeks and I need walking around money". Little did they realize what an articling student is paid. Flush with good credit, I lashed out for a car (black) Johnson & Murphey shoes to complement my Florshiems, and two Cambridge brand suits. One Charcoal worsted, and one summer-weight pale grey. I have never spent so much money on clothes in one day before or since. Not even in most years. I was hooked from that day forward.

And now, here I am, married, homeowner, piled with responsibility, with little hope of satisfying the desire I have (some would say conformist snobbery, but I reserve that label for those wearing Prada and D&G, conservative business attire is hardly conformist these days) for fine woolen goods. There is a ray of hope, though. I have just discovered on the internet a store, four blocks from my office, that sells, "gently used" men's designer suits. Armani, Zenga, (Yawn) Hugo Boss... and down at the bottom of the page, "Samuelsohn".

It could be worse, a pack a day of cigarettes is still a two-Samuelsohn-a-year equivalent.

Unexpected expenses 101

Or, rather, $375.00, the tab for a new as-is clearance floor model washing machine.

Funny how you get used to being able to do laundry whenever you feel like it without searching for quarters and going for a drive, isn't it? Well, on Sunday, our laundry machine decided that it's drain pump would be better off making a burning electric motor smell than moving water out of the washer. As an entry level washer, it would cost more to fix than to replace, so off I go to the local furniture store, let's call it "The Cinder-Block", where I plonked down my much abused plastic for the cheapest thing in the department, which happens to be a rather nice washer marked down $200.00 because the bleach dispenser cap is missing. I can mix up my own bleach, thank you very much.

The down side of this is that they don't deliver to my area (who does, indeed) so I get to spend my Saturday moving laundry machines up and down the stairs to my basement.

All this comes at the same time as Jenn finding out that she will not be needed to cover the leave she had been subbing for for the first two weeks of school, leaving her at a .17 FTE, without benefits, and us a little poor for right now. Our best hope for not having to subsist on the crumbs we can scrape out of the bottom of the toaster will be my quarter-end bonus next Tuesday. Here's hoping it's not small.

I gots those four-time stage-crossin' mortarboardin' blues...

Against my better judgment, I have decided to attend my November 20th convocation. I now have two attendees and three tickets. The third ticket is up for grabs, and there may be more available. If anyone wants to be bored to tears for no good reason, just let me know. Personally, I think convocation is just a scam to get another $35.00 fee out of me and to make me sit around wasting a whole day on a work day when I could be out getting people divorced.

This one will make # 4. High school, BA, LLB. and now LL.M. Oddly, the one I seem to actually remember is high school.

The other news is that Jenn has a job full time staring Tuesday. She will be teaching .829 FTE at an elementary school covering what appears at this point to be a long-term leave. There may be more permanent jobs show up soon, we don't know. Next year is looking good because 6 new Jr and Sr high schools re opening in Edmonton and there will be a wave of retirements, too, most likely, so there will probably be a ton of positions opening up, at which she will get an insider's crack, being employed by the board and all. So this year we eat, next yer, maybe even more.

Test results

Some of you may remember my April 22 Beer Judge Certification Program exam. While I was away camping in Fairmont, the results came in by e-mail. I scored 83/100 on the tasting portion and 90/100 on the written portion. What this means is that (if you apply last year's statistics to this one) I am in the top 10% or so of exam writers. This thrilled me to no small extent.

Also camping was good, but I ate wayyyyyy too much everything.

Aaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnd.............Done

As of August 22, 2008, I have completed all of the requirements of Master of Laws. My convocation is on November 20, and if you want to celebrate, I think I may be feeling partyish at that point. This is the culmination of 4 years of research, hard work and procrastination, and I feel like I have accomplished something. About 6 students per year start their LL.M at the U of A, and every time someone graduates, an announcement is made via e-mail to the rest of the students. About 6 people have completed in the 4 years I have been at it. I suspect that the drop-out rate is around 75%, on that basis.

So, big kudos for me.

Hemi-demi-semi done his thesis, he quavered...

I handed in my revisions Tuesday, today (Wednesday) got a call from my advisor saying he would call back tonight with an hour or so worth of revisions still needed, but nothing major, which means (If he ever does call) that I may be able to hand in my thesis by this Friday, rather than next and by doing so:
1) Be able to actually enjoy camping;
2) Be flipping well finished.

Also today, I went to court and actually WON! Completely won, like, on everything. And it was actually over an amount of money worth fighting over, too. I called my client to let them know we won, and they seemed kinda noncommittal. If I was about to get as much money as they re, I would be flipping thrilled.

This week seems to be my week of settling files. About 2 per day. If this keeps up, I will be able to take new clients again soon. And other clients fired me, which works just as well for reducing workload, if not more so because inevitably it is on high-conflict files that you get fired, and dropping one of those is as good as dropping three or four regular files.

Plus people seem to actually have recognized the fact that they have to pay their lawyer in a timely and complete fashion, which is a giant bonus when you are trying to justify your existence. A fellow needs to do more around the office than look pretty and drink his weight in beer

Update

How has the thesis writing been going? Good during the weekend, not as good weeknights, which has put me a little behind. I have therefore ordered a "Do it yourself long weekend kit" consisting of telling your boss you aren't coming in on Friday, a box of Popsicles, and 72 straight hours of quality time with my word processor. On the up side, I seem to be getting ahead at work, although I have yet to find a good balance between hyper-busy and kinda bored. At least hyper-busy means that I might make some bonus money this quarter to keep the wolves at bay. I seem to have managed to wind up in court four days next week. Not sure how that happened. Then we are going camping, which should be fun.

My main complaint lately is that the Olympics are too cool, and i wind up staying up past my bedtime to watch. I think they need to make sports less interesting.

Owen's Thesis

So it turns out that my defence was not on the 12th, but rather on the 1st, which was today. This was not a surprise to me, it just didn't make it onto my blog. The defence itself took 3 hours and the verdict was passed subject to revisions, which is exactly what I expected to happen. The practical outcome of this is that I have one more round of revisions to do to my thesis before I am done, but I don't have to go back before the committee. I will, however, be disappearing from view and spending most of my time working on the bloody thing some more until it is done. It could take me a few days, it could take me two weeks, but I will not be doing anything else until I am done, because I don't want to have to jump through the hoops needed to re-register for an additional semester after the technical end date of my program.

Wow

Today I finished the formatting for my thesis, tomorrow, I hand in a copy at FGSR, August 12, I defend, I submit almost right away after that.

Wow. Almost done. I wonder what I will feel guilty about not doing once it's done.

To celebrate, I will make beer.

More boring things that only interest me

This Canada Day weekend, I have worked on finishing my thesis (target date: Wednesday) and made two batches of beer, an Oatmeal Stout and Southern English Brown Ale This brings me to a total of 7 of 80, or almost 10% of the way to my goal. The addition of an electronic thermometer has really helped to have the beer turn out properly. Bottling of the Special bitter will be next weekend, and if i have enough bottles, I will bottle the stout too.

Our latest happenings and some beer

Just to keep people up to date, Jenn returned safely from the United states, although not without incident. Due to construction in Chicago, her bus from South Bend was delayed by almost an hour and she missed her check-in for the flight to Calgary. You can imagine the stream of increasingly agitated texts that I got. The good folks at United Airlines were good enough to stand her by for the direct flight to Edmonton leaving three hours later, which still had her home 45 minutes early. The bottom line there is that the only reason she wasn't on that flight in the first place was because it would have been an extra $300 if we had booked it that way.

When she got home, Jenn started in on Physio for her arm, which has been going well - and her arm is now out of the sling most of the time. She did have a bad ear infection, a flu, and what appears now to be a lung infection. I haven't caught any of this yet, but I assume it is only a matter of time until I do.

Jenn's work has been winding down as she is now supervising exams and shutting down the classroom for the summer. She won't be taking over the Mat Leave she had been promised and pressured to take, because they found a Catholic candidate at the last minute. She has, however, set up a program where she will be teaching band for distance-learning students throughout Edmonton, which means that she has a foot in the door at Edmonton Public. She has also applied to teach summer school and to do a few other sundry things to scrape together what (If I were to be earning it) I would call Beer Money, but I'm sure she would be more likely to spend on other more useful things.

At my work, a new articling student started at the beginning of the week, which has been kind of interesting. It really makes you appreciate how steep the learning curve was for you at the start of your career to see someone else go through it. I have also started taking new clients again for the first time in about three months.

Finally the beer News - After careful consideration of our ongoing likelihood of selling the house on any given day, I decided that my need to make my own beer outweighed my need for a spotless house, and I had Nick the Mighty Brewer over for some brewing. We hit Style 8B (English Special Bitter) with the following recipe:

4.4 KG 2 row pale malt
227 G Dark Munich
227 G Med Crystal
60 G Chocolate Malt

Single infusion Mash at 153 F

11 G Warrior @ 16.3% 60 Min
11 G Fuggles @ 4.5% & 7 G Hallertau @ 3.7% 20 Minutes
11 G Fuggles @ 4.5% & 7 G Hallertau @ 3.7% 1 minute

It seems pretty good so far. I'll let you know when I bottle if it tastes any good.

Embracing a different lifestyle

For the next three days, I will be embracing the "no-wife-at-home" lifestyle, which I can confirm isn't as much fun as the "my wife is in the same city as me" lifestyle. I don't handle these brief returns to single life particularly well, being a big needy tool like I am. While many men might relish a few days away from the old ball-and-chain, I rather dread the backslide into unfortunate single-life habits that actually living with someone prevents. For one thing, I haven't had any vegetables today. In fact, I think I will go eat some fruit just to keep from going totally feral. I feel a bit like Red Foreman when he said, "What is it God? It's Okay to eat meat and beer and cheese? Okay, I'll tell her..."

The trip to the Airport started out all wrong, with Jenn leaving her tickets and documents on the kitchen counter. I'm glad she had remembered to pack her passport, because I forgot to check for it on my trip back into the house to find the tickets.

On top of my already starting to live like a university student who has been turned loose in a friend's parent's house for the weekend unsupervised with a key to the liquor cabinet, to make matters worse, the text messages I am getting from Jenn are becoming increasingly alarming.

15:51 "Hey, I arrived at ND... Everyone was in the basement because of the severe tornado warning..."

16:44 "Can you contact the travel medical insurance people for me, I think I need to go to the hospital..."

18:00 "I'm a the hospital, and there are injured babies all over the place..."

The trip to the hospital is unrelated to the tornadoes, - ear infection - but I'm not sure about the injured babies. I keep expecting to turn on the news and see that the dead are rising from the grave to feast on the flesh of the living in Indiana. I'm just glad we chunked the extra $22.00 for the travel medical... I don't relish the thought of an un-insured hospital trip in the good-old USA.

This does have the effect of making the third trip to the hospital, and as we all know, bad things come in threes. My finger, Jenn's Shoulder, Jenn's ear. Now we should be clear for at least a month without going to any emergency rooms.

And now, for just a bit of out-shouting, for some generally unrecognized co-bloggers and friends who deserve some recognition, especially as I don't blog too much these days, and I don't have the long distance plan to call them anymore:

Malcolm, you old giant, next time I'm in town we're hitting Wild Rose, I met one of the higher-ups at a beer judging, and I am commanded to show up for a pint at the taproom.

Speaking of Brewers, Brian - congratulations on finishing your exams.

Ms. Mayhem, as you are now my official Vancouver connection, you may be imposed upon to direct me to excellent sushi and Indian next time I am in town. Take Heed. Also hug Mr. Tall for me next time you see him.

My Brother Doesn't
Update His Blog Very Much
Even Though he should.

Fabsuz - I promise to show you a good time next time you are in Edmonton - and don't give me that "I'm not going to be there" crap... we know that is all lies.

and to Dree and Goose, who prove that a friend you haven't met is not necessarily a stranger,
Dree: I look forward to seeing the upcoming knitting, I am strongly considering compounding the interest on the beer you owe me and taking it in the form of mittens and a place to stay the next time I am coming to the festival in Canso, and

Goose: You are in our (choose one - completely secular thoughts / prayers - whichever you would prefer.) as you welcome Fetus into non-fetus status.

Jenn just texted me an update telling me that
1) Yes, she has an ear infection.
2) It would have ruptured by morning.
3) She has seen the doctor and Pharmacist.
4) Drug prices in the US are unconcionable.

So if all of you can keep us in your (totally secular thoughts/prayers) (at your discretion) It would be much appreciated at this, our time of ear infections and separation.

In unrelated News

Notwithstanding Jenn's busted up wing, I decided to be the standard husband and go drink beer on weeknights. As a judge in the BJCP, I have certain responsibilites, which just happen to inculde dringing 47 different beers in 3 days, and giving each one serious consideration. Tonight, I get to clean the house, which needs it in a bad way after having been torn apart for painting, and then neglected by the only able-bodied person in the house in favour of beer.

Oh, and I forgot, on my last post, whoever had a double pick of Jenn/dislocation and Owen/electrocution is the overall winner in the pool.

Painting

So many of you know that Jenn and I were having a crowd over to paint yesterday. Many of you will also know that I am not generally known as the most careful or graceful person in the world, and that home improvement of any variety seems to only make my clumsiness worse. The question therefore is,

"Who had 'Owen falls off the Ladder while painting and has to go to the hospital' in the pool?"

Because that person would NOT win.

The winner is, "Jenn falls down the stairs and dislocates her shoulder while trying to carry curtains to the basement to put in the wash."

Anyway, long story short, Jenni s 6 weeks in a sling, and is pissed about that, we didn't get nearly the painting we had hoped to done being several hands short, but we did manage to get most of the downstairs and upstairs hallway and get a start on the master bedroom. A particular thanks goes out to Jocelyn, who sat with Jenn and tried to keep her from hyperventilating while I proceeded to completely lose it.

Operation: Carboy drop.

Or, in reality, Carboy drop, then operation - to-wit 6 stitches in my little finger of my left hand. Starting to hurt some. Tylenol 3 should be kicking in pretty soon. I'm fine. Don't worry. I still have more fingers than average.

Happenings

After a break from work (and blogging) I am back to the old salt mines, but the reduced pressure of no new files has allowed me to get some older stuff sorted out. Soon files will be closing and we will be back to a reasonable level.

On other topics, the Flames seem hell-bent on breaking my heart yet again, as I assumed they would, the beer I blogged about that I should have been bottling last August was finally thrown out last weekend, and I write my BJCP exam next Saturday, leaving me one week to study the diverse and complex topic of Beer.

Our house still hasn't sold, in its 15th week on the market, which is alright, except that it sucks having to clean all the time, since I am a complete slob when I can get away with it.

Anyway, back to my studies ... everything from AAU to Zymurgy.

I ain't saying I'm burnt out, but today was a bit of a flicker.

Today I ran out of steam in a huge way just after lunch. Several files are in the process of blowing up, and none of my files seem to be resolving. I have clients who seem to be on quest to make my life difficult, and I have opposing counsel who seem to be doing the same. For the first time in a long time, I have been losing sleep over files. (Also because today at 5:30 AM the cats decided to have a 'who can piss Owen off the most' contest.) My energy is waning, and it is affecting my ability to function at the level at which I want to. One factor in this is the sheer number of active files I am conducting, well over 100 since the other family law lawyer left the firm. This is about double what it should be. As a result, I will not be taking new files for the foreseeable future, and I will be working to close the ones I have to get down to a proper caseload.

Getting at the root of the problem is one key, and that is one that will have to be addressed over the next weeks and months. The other key is to de-stress right now, which means improving my diet and exercise, and really enjoying my upcoming 4 day weekend.

Larium

Antimalarial drugs are giving me an upset tummy. Could be worse. They're giving Jenn strange dreams. Either way, Jenn isn't getting much sleep.

Mandy apparently adopted again.

Mandy's profile has again been removed from the EHS website, which means I am much happier. I will stay that way until she shows up again.

Sadness

I checked again today, and "Dot", better known as Mandy, is back up on the EHS website. Our initial hopes for a short stay for Mandy have been overthrown. Mandy is still in need of a home and of love. If you know someone who needs/wants a very snuggly apex predator, please point them to "Dot", pet #5900.

Now that I have no snow tires...

AS OF 3 PM RADAR INDICATES BANDS OF SNOW DEVELOPING TO THE NORTHWEST OF EDMONTON VICINITY THE SWAN HILLS. THIS AREA OF SNOW IS FORECAST TO INTENSIFY AND TRACK SOUTHEASTWARDS THIS EVENING. A LOW PRESSURE SYSTEM WILL DEVELOP NEAR CALGARY LATER THIS AFTERNOON AND THEN TRACK RAPIDLY SOUTHEASTWARD INTO SOUTHWESTERN SASKATCHEWAN BY WEDNESDAY MORNING. THIS SYSTEM WILL TAP INTO A WARM STREAM OF MOIST PACIFIC AIR AND IS EXPECTED TO BLANKET THE ABOVE REGIONS WITH 8 TO 12 CENTIMETRES OF FRESH SNOW. IN ADDITION THESE AREAS WILL EXPERIENCE STRONG EASTERLY WINDS AND REDUCED VISIBILITIES IN BLOWING SNOW ESPECIALLY IN EXPOSED AREAS. BRIEF PERIODS OF FREEZING RAIN ARE POSSIBLE AS WELL

Mmmmm, warm Pacific air mass, with everything that entails - above-normal temperatures (a wlecome departure, I assure you) moisture in the air, oh yeah, and huge amounts of heavy, wet, slippery snow. I really don't mind, I just hope that my new car with it's low-profile all-seasons doesn't wind me up in the ditch. Just chant along with me, "Drive for the conditions...Drive for the conditions...."

Someone loves Mandy.

Today, I did my normal review of the Edmonton Humane Society website to check up on Mandy. She had been put up on the site about 1 week ago. She is now off of the site, which means that she has been adopted. Someone has seen her extra-love personality and her complete gentleness, and taken her home. I only hope that she will be treated as an indoor cat, and given plenty of love, because that is what she deserves.

For whoever took cat #5900 "Dot" (Real name - Princess Mandolin (Mitten) Manjit Bananna-Muffin Sunbeam-Tiger Cat-Taylor-Kirkaldy (AKA Mangalore, AKA Mandibles, AKA Mang, AKA Mangy-Moo, AKA Mucous)) into their home, I wish you the warmest blessings of whatever god-figure, analogous entity, or lack thereof that you (believe/tell your mom you believe/don't believe) in.

Humiliation at the Opera

On Tuesday, I attended the Edmonton Opera's production of "HMS Pinnafore" as part of the "Opera Explorer's Club" Which is a fancy way of saying "Rush seats, pizza and beer for people under 30 who want to go to the opera".

It was at the pizza and beer intermission that I had my humiliating experience - I was part of a group of people, albiet a small part, who were admonished for.... (it's almost too horrible to say)...

Not Drinking Enough Beer.

Sure enough, of the 50 or so people in the room, there were perhaps 10 who had availed themselves of the free beer that was already poured and waiting for them. I did my best and sucked back two, fast, between acts, but I wasn't able to make a serious dent in the backlog by myself. Embarassing.

Moreover, the Total Loss department has finally gotten back to me about my truck and made a better offer. I will be accepting that and probably buying the car that the firm accepted in lieu of fees from one client. It kind of looks like a drug-dealer's Civic, but that's only because it was, well, a drug dealer's Civic. That having been said, it will be nice to have a vehicle with a trunk again. I am a little dissapointed that I don't get a convertible, but that's on my wishlist for sooner rather than later. The nice thing about the 3rd generation Miatas is that they have dropped the bottom out of the used market for 2nd generation Miatas.

Moist Kitty

Today the inevitible happened. Little Billie fell into the fishtank. She got out just fine, and made a big mess right before the open house, but I don't think she'll be going after those fish for a while.

Post # 200

To celebrate the 200th post, I will provide the good news. I am alive. I have not frozen to death in this cold snap. This, according to the Globe and Mail and other reputable news sources, places me ahead of quite a number of other people in the last week. Two small children have frozen to death in Saskatchewan, three people were killed in a blizzard on the road between Edmonton and Jasper, and a cat was found, I am not making this up, frozen to the sidewalk in Edmonton last week.

In other news, the total loss people have finally told me that they are making an offer on my truck. I will be squeezing them for closer to what it is worth, but I might just be able to buy a working car with what they will give me. Fingers crossed, people.

Jenn Went back to work today. Apparently, it was...bleich. The kids were really happy she was back, and plenty of the staff. On top of that, her grievance has been formalized, and we are now at the start of the actual "under the collective agreement" thing. What that means is that if the timelines for the grievance process all go the maximum length, Jenn's problems might just get resolved by the end of the teaching year. Isn't that great?

Anyway, work has been going good for me, I have been rocking the whole practicing law thing, and I hope to actually be finished my thesis soon too, which would allow me to justify reading for fun.

You can get used to anything

Witness the fact that I was happy on my drive in to work because it was "Only" -38c WITH the windchill. The actual temperature was only -28c.

Next week it is supposed to go up near zero. I don't know how I will cope. I'll have to take off all my clothes and go tanning on the front lawn.

A weather update

The windchill this morning on my way to work was announced on the radio as -47c. My colleague spent an hour digging his car out of the end of his driveway, and had to go home with mild hypothermia at noon.

I am not looking forward to the drive home. I think I may leave early to take advantage of the daylight.

My weather forecast

Here is what environment Canada has to say about Spruce Grove tomorrow:

AN ARCTIC AIR MASS HAS SETTLED OVER NORTHERN AND CENTRAL ALBERTA. THE VERY COLD TEMPERATURES COMBINED WITH A BRISK NORTHERLY WIND WILL PRODUCE EXTREME WIND CHILL VALUES BELOW MINUS 40 TONIGHT INTO MONDAY MORNING. HIGH RISK OF FROSTBITE. EXPOSED SKIN CAN FREEZE IN 5 TO 10 MINUTES OR SOONER DEPENDING ON WIND SPEED. REDUCED VISIBILITIES IN SNOW AND BLOWING SNOW ARE OCCURRING IN THE COLD LAKE, FORT SASKATCHEWAN AND LLOYDMINSTER REGIONS. SNOWFALL AMOUNTS NEAR 10 CENTIMETRES ARE EXPECTED AND WIND CHILL VALUES WILL FALL BELOW MINUS 40. VISIBILITIES AND SNOWFALL ARE EXPECTED TO IMPROVE MONDAY MORNING HOWEVER WIND CHILLS WILL REMAIN BELOW MINUS 40 INTO MONDAY.

Doesn't that sound lovely?

Here are a couple of pictures of the tiny kitten. She is very tiny and very sweet.

Part two of the saga of the visit to the Edmonton Humane Society

As sad as we were to leave Mandy at the shelter for someone who can provide a ferret-proofed space for her, we couldn't leave a cat at an over-capacity shelter without doing our part to make us cat-neutral. On the way home, we were joined by Pet # 5174 (Shiraz). She was promptly re-named in the music theme: Billie (Bear) Holiday Cat-Kirkaldy. She is almost as snuggly as Banjo was when he was her age, but she hasn't shown any distinct preference for Jenn yet, so I have high hopes she might like me too.

I am not very happy.

Last night, Mandy, who has already had an ongoing problem for three years with chewing through string, has moved on to harder stuff. Electrical cords. This makes my cat a fire hazard.

So this afternoon, we are going to the humane society to give her up to the program for cats who are too difficult to live with and are adopted as barn cats. This means that my cat, who is the gentlest cat I think I have ever seen with people (although lethal to anything smaller than her) will have a new life where she will probably never get another tummy rub. After about noon, she won't be getting any from me.

Okay, I know.. Long time no post.

But, hey, it's the holidays, and I can't be expected to make room for blogging when there are cookies to eat.

Okay, here's a roundup of the events since the last post.

Supper club Christmas Dinner - This took place at the apartment down the hall from the crack dealer downtown, otherwise known as M&N's. I must say that the supper was a much needed non-turkey experience, as we would be starting in on a string of traditional Christmas Dinners.

23rd - Our house Christmas Dinner -
We wrapped a free-range turkey in bacon, made Brussels Sprouts a-la-Mornay, mashed potatoes, carrot pudding, creamed carrots with parsley, two kinds of stuffing, and that wasn't including what the family brought (scalloped potatoes, desserts, salads, assorted other veggies). I just want to say that 1: not stuffing a turkey leaves it moister than with stuffing, 2: an electronic probe thermometer on a remote works wonders for having a turkey done exactly right, 3: Jenn's grandma is way too much fun when she's doing shooters with the girls.

24th - Family Supper in Sherwood Park -
There were a lot of dogs. Also there was a baby. The turkey was not as moist. We left early to get to church, where Jenn played flute, which was awesome. Then we went back to the in-laws.

25th - Christmas Morning and Bus Ride -
Turkey sandwiches for lunch, also we got us a bread maker, which kicks bum, since our old one has pretty much kicked the bucket. Jenn gave me a digital camera, which she bought just before learning that we won one in the home lotto. That's getting returned for store credit as soon as we can get there. We have our eyes on a couple of items.

At 3:00, we got on the bus and headed to Calgary. We took the Greyhound as an experiment, rather than the luxury option - the Red Arrow. The Red Arrow is worth the extra money. On the trip down, one fellow was so drunk he thought he was on a plane to Halifax. he started screaming "Just land this M**********R already!!!" along with shouts of "Holy S***" and "F***" and "What the F*** are you looking at?!? I'll take care of YOU!"

Fun, eh? So the driver pulls over, manhandles him to the front of the bus, and calls the cops. Within 10 minutes, buddy is on his way to the RCMP cells in Olds, and I just can't get the old Pogues song "Fairytale of New York" out of my head. Seriously though, No more Greyhound for us. They don't screen the passengers as well as either the airlines or the Red Arrow.

We arrive about a half hour late and eat Tourtierre and Quiche, and play with my brother's Guitar Hero III until it was time to open presents, which we did. I got, among other things, an HBC gift card, which leads us to...

26th - Boxing Day -
We arrived early at the mall, where I bought a new banker's coat at 40% off, and Jenn went nuts at Lululemon. Just after the coat-buying, Jenn shouted at me about hating to shop with me and yelled at us both to leave, so my brother and I headed out to the Wildwood Brewpub (Which has gone downhill) and then to a buddy's place to play "Rock Band" which I found fun because it was like Karaoke for points.

Later we picked up a shopped-out Jenn from the mall, and headed home for turkey dinner #3 at my parents house. This was a somewhat quieter affair, with no shooters and no dogs, just the steady application of too much food and too much wine and too much scotch until the company went home. All in all, a good supper, and it laid the foundation for...

27th - A day of rest (and turkey) -
On the 27th, we went out shopping again, and I picked up some shirts at winners so that I don't have to look like such a gorf all the time. We ate turkey soup for lunch, and turkey-Shepard's pie for supper.

28th - Travel -
Seriously, the greyhound driver took such a retarded route out of the city that we left the terminal at 4:00 and weren't on the highway until almost 5:00. Add to that the fact that the lights in the coach wouldn't turn on, and we had a pretty rotten trip, with no reading, no sudoku, and only our lupper to hold our interest. It included - you guessed it - turkey sandwiches. MMMMMMMMMMMM. I love turkey.

when we arrived back in Edmonton, our car wouldn't start until we plugged it in for about an hour, so we killed some time with getting me a haircut and whatnot.

29th - Today -
Wre have no turkey to eat. In a way, this makes me sad, but then I think of the gallon sized ziplock in the freezer holding our leftovers from the 23rd and all the good things that that will make, and I get a little happy.

In the morning, we listed our house for sale, following which we will be moving back to Edmonton, and lopping about 30-45 minutes each way from our commutes, which will give us an extra 2-3 man-hours per day to put in into renovations. It should also make it easier for our friends to come over, since it is kind of a long haul to Spruce Grove.

This evening, I get to put on my suit and go to a wedding of a distant cousin of Jenn's. This means (I hope) no turkey. Fingers Crossed, people.

So that is my update, I could have broken it down into several chunks over the last few days, but as you can see I was busy, and my Mom's computer is kind of, well, in need of an upgrade.

Happy New Year to all our readers, and for those of you in Supper Club, see you for the annual fondue in a couple days.

Coming up on Christmas

It is now about a month post-accident and the folks at the insurance company have not yet decided if they will be repairing or writing off my truck. I want to know because it is time for an oil change and the tranny fluid could use changed too if I am keeping it. Otherwise, I'm not going to bother.

Christmas is almost upon us, and that means that Jenn's students are performing Christmas concerts. I attended the first one along with a ton of other supporters, and we were really really impressed. Her grade 7 students didn't sound like they had been playing only for a few months (except for one bunch) and her Jr High Jazz band was really really good.

What about other Christmas stuff? My Christmas shopping is just about done, I just need top get Jenn her "Good" present, and the rest is over. That includes buying the turkey for the dinner on the 23rd. I bought a free-range farm turkey from Parkland Packers, although I think I will need to get one more, since it is only 17# and there are at least 12 people coming. I think I will need to get a small turkey to do alongside. I am also making the Christmas pudding as we speak, even though I am probably the only one who will eat it, I will continue to make it until people smarten up. The only thing I really still need for the supper is brussels sprouts, but I'm sure I will be able to manage. They will be made a-la-mornay, as they should be this time of year. The stuffing will be my mom's recipe if I can finagle it, and the cranberry sauce will be hand-made, since I'm that kind of guy.

For New Years, we will be having the Supper Club Gang over for Fondue and debauchery. Mostly debauchery. I have already picked up the non-alcoholic sparkling beverage (for those who don't drink) and some Jacob's Creek Sparkling Pinot Noir Blanc de Noir for those who do, together with Blue Curacao and Raspberry Sourpuss, to make the shooters that the girls all like, which go by the unfortunate name "Porn Star". I suppose that the theory is that if you drink enough of them, you start acting like, well....

I have further been considering another potential new tradition to insert between New Year's fondue and Lunar New Year. I think that I should start a tradition of mid-winter Fiesta in the third week of January. I propose that I host supper club around that time for a menu of traditional Mexican and Tex-Mex offerings. I need to use my tortilla press for something, folks! And don't forget that I have all the tequila in the world lying in my basement, and if I don;t have a reason to use it, I won't finish it before I go back to Mexico. Throw in a couple of cases of Pacifico or Dos Equis, and we are in business.

Yes, I think that we need to get that together.